Already Dirty vs Staying Clean

July 21, 2023 | 5 Min. Read

Are you walking around feeling "already dirty"? Join me as I talk about our family's camping experience to explore how perception can affect the physical steps we take and what changes when that perception shifts

Our family has been camping a lot over the past 12 months.

At the start, last September, it was a solution to a housing transition as we were moving out-of-state.

That first season lasted 6 weeks as we waited to buy a house. It was hard on us for many reasons, with staying clean being a big one.

We were in a pop-up camper -- no onboard toilet or shower -- and we shared a single porta-potty with about 15 different people, every day.

For that 6 weeks, we located a gym nearby and paid for a membership so we could have more security around our hygiene.

When we bought our house, we soon discovered we would be in for a 6 month street project. We realized we would have interruptions in our gas, water, sewer, and internet over the months they'd be replacing all those lines.

We decided to trade the pop-up for a camper with all those features and use it to get away when our services were disconnected at home.

This is why we've been camping every other weekend since mid-April.

There have been many lessons learned through the experience, and today I'm sharing one of those. Most of the campgrounds near us have had reservations since last summer, way before we even knew we'd be moving, let alone all the camping we'd end up doing.

That has meant that we get the unpopular sites; ones that don't have a sewer hook up, are next to the highway, or just far away from the bathrooms.

Do the math on 4 people, 3 of them girls, using water for 4 days, and you'll see that our gray water tank gets full quickly. So, we all do our best to use whatever facility is available for showering, to keep the tank from filling too fast.

On one of these trips, we stayed at a great location, and our spot was right next to the river. It rained the first couple days and nights, and the dirt road got really muddy.

The showers were at the front of the camp ground, so we had to walk through a few different muddy areas to get there. I walked with my teenage daughter over to the showers.

She mentioned how she noticed that, over the weekend, I was always walking in ways to avoid the dirt, even going way out of my way. I told her I do that because I have a preference for not getting my shoes dirty.

She said it didn't bother her; She has a preference for going the shortest distance.

After we finished cleaning up, we started walking back to our camper.

I walked back the same way I had come, sort of retracing my steps.

My daughter, on the other hand, suddenly wanted to walk behind me, which is out of the ordinary for her.

(She's always been my kid who insists, "I do myself!")

I turned to notice why she was behind me, and she laughed at my questioning expression (my face hides nothing) saying, "I didn't care before because I was already dirty. But now that I'm clean, I care — I want to stay clean!"

In the moment, I just laughed with her and didn't think more of her comment.

Then the next day, I was walking back from my shower by myself, again taking my strange series of steps as I worked my way over the dirt using the drier areas.

Since I was alone, I was pondering in the silence, and I thought back to what she had said —the difference she experienced being clean and how it impacted her choices; and more important to me, her willingness to take a longer, less obvious, more difficult path to maintain the difference she felt.

I thought about how it was a picture of us in Spirit, when we see ourselves as "already dirty.” How we will not mind stepping in the dirt.

We won't try to avoid it, especially if it's the more direct, shorter, or easier path to what we really want, which is to "get cleaned up."

However, as my daughter discovered, she had to follow me. She didn't know how to walk the same path back to our spot without getting dirt on her.

The only experience she'd had required her to walk in the dirty places, which she now wanted to avoid.

This was such a picture of Jesus to me.

He walked this life -- and he walked it "clean". As we are "washed in Christ," we get "cleaned up."

Our renewed spirit wants to stay clean, but we need to follow in his steps to make that journey.

It isn't the shortest, easiest, or most direct path to what we want, but it will get us to our spot by the river — the river of life — and we’ll arrive clean, without a spot or stain on us.

One key takeaway I gained is that how we regard ourselves has everything to do with where we are willing to take our steps.

If I regard myself as being “messed up”, “already dirty”, or even worse, I am actually more vulnerable to taking the muddy shortcut to my desired goal.

In the short term, it seems harmless and maybe even the smarter way to go. “Why bother with trying to keep myself clean when I already have mud on me? Who cares? Why go to the extra effort?”

The answer is found in the long run. When we zoom out to see the bigger picture, we discover that when we take the muddy shortcut, we will have painted ourselves into a corner. The only way out is to get muddy again, and we will lose all the benefits we gained getting “clean”.

On the other hand, when we’re regarding ourselves as “cleaned up”, we find we have a preference for staying clean that brings a willingness to go the extra distance, to take awkward steps, and to look less than smart, and maybe even foolish to those who take the muddy shortcuts.

There’s more to unpack here, but I will have to save it for the future.

For now, I will simply say that following Jesus means taking that strange-looking path of steps that don’t seem to make sense to others watching us make our way through this life.

Yet, it’s by our willingness to follow him, that we will be able to help them navigate their path in new ways, ways they never needed before, that they suddenly do.

And our willingness to take those extra steps comes from seeing ourselves as “already clean” — a self-identification we make based on our identity in Christ.

How about you:

Does this idea resonate with how you are or aren’t following in Jesus’ steps?

Is it easier or harder to “stay clean” in your business vs your health or your relationships?

What insights can you share about the process of transforming from seeing yourself as “already dirty” to “cleaned up?”

About the Author

Kristi Rae Millsap MBA is a writer, veteran, and certified, professional Christian coach.
She started consulting in 2012 after earning her MBA in Healthcare Management and getting laid off from her corporate job as a frontend developer and internet marketing analyst. Consulting led to serving in ministry, coaching, and writing.

Kristi enjoys bringing new ideas to life and sharing creative insights to help Christian entrepreneurs learn how to gain more time-freedom to love God with all their heart, mind, and strength.

Kristi is married to Reverend Paul Millsap, and together they shepherd their family of 9 children. Together, they minister in the areas of marriage, re-marriage, divorce, parenting and grandparenting, especially focusing on forgiveness, grace, mercy, and living at peace.

With support from Paul, Kristi also homeschools the family's last child at home in Minnesota. They both love spending time on the road, exploring old towns, connecting with new churches, and visiting their kids' families and 10 grandchildren.